He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Randomize
