Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
