Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
