I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
