His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
So vagazzling was a success
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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