have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I could make wine with my vomit
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
