I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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