i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
