The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I have tasted many bathrooms
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
