Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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