It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
