Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You are the jesus of drinking
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
