I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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