when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
