no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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