i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
