It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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