He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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