I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
