I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
