You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
