quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
