Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
