She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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