margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
