Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
