I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
