We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
