so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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