There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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