you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
