She's JV to your varsity
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
The uberlube is also flammable
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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