dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
