in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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