I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize