I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
