just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
