it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
