When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
