i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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