i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
