Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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