I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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