Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
COCAINE IS GR8
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I'm always down for nudity.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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