Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
