She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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