can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
