Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I understand Curling. That high.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
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