I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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