he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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